Super Mutants: the ever-present enemy of any respectable Fallout hero. Whether you’re playing as the Vault Dweller, the Sole Survivor or the Lone Wanderer, chances are you’ve encountered more than your fair share of these genetically-enhanced monsters.
Once upon a time, these creatures were no different from you or I, being created from standard human stock. Some of them have even regained their intelligence and their empathy, such as Fawkes, Uncle Leo or the original friendly green-b o y e, Marcus. But these examples are few and far-between, with the Forced Evolutionary Virus (FEV) instilling in most Super Mutants a desire, or rather a need, to kill, maim and burn everyone they find their paths.
So, naturally, when I wanted to create a drink that adequately represented these violent beasts (and their interesting backstory), I went with something that has a depth of flavour, but will inevitably knock you on your arse if you mess with it too much.
Here’s how to make one:
- 2 parts vodka
- 1 part tequila blanco
- 1 part white rum
- 1 part triple sec
- 1 part midori
- 8-10 raspberries
- raspberry cordial
- sparkling white wine to top up
- Thoroughly muddle the raspberries as the bottom of a highball glass.
- Add the vodka, tequila, rum, triple sec and Midori to a shaker half-filled with ice.
- Shake for 10 – 15 seconds.
- Strain carefully into the glass, aiming to avoid disturbing the muddled raspberries.
- Layer the raspberry cordial to the bottom of the glass, pouring over the back of a spoon.
- Carefully pour the sparkling white wine over the back of a spoon to top up the mixture until the glass is full.
You’ll be presented with a drink that is green, red, sloppy and outright ugly. What would you expected from a drink named The Super Mutant after all? But don’t let its looks fool you; this is a complex little number with a lot of different flavours going on, from the acidic white wine to the sugary Midori right through to the… ‘interesting’ mouthfeel of alcohol-infused muddled raspberries at the bottom.
A note of caution, however: like all Super Mutants, this drink will knock you the fuck out. Depending on the proportions, there can be anything upwards of four or five standard drinks worth of alcohol in this puppy: it is, after all, based on a Long Island Iced Tea, so be exceptionally careful with how many you decide to serve up. Two or three of these will feel like you took a Super Sledge straight to the forehead. We humans made The Super Mutant, and “now [we’re] going to pay for our hubris”, to put it in the words of the surprisingly erudite Super Mutants of the Commonwealth.
If you’d like to try an alternative, try swapping out one part of the vodka for gin, or switch the raspberries for an equally red fruit, such as strawberries or cherries. You’ll still get that gross fleshy texture at the bottom of the glass, but miss out on that raspberry tartness that not everybody is fond of.